The Mindset of Sparring - Sensei's Challenge

Collaborative sparring mindset is difficult to attain, but the results are astronomically different than competitive sparring.


What do I mean by that? 
If you look at any world class athlete, they always surround themselves with people better than them, in order to learn.


The learning is often in the losing moreso than in the winning.

Being challenged and being forced to grow is a harder road, but, a much more opulent one.

Think of your own sparring (of any type).  What is your sparring mindset? 

Are you analyzing them for strengths & weaknesses and teaching them to improve, or, are you simply hoping to win?

Are you seeking to create challenging situations for yourself and them, or, are you hoping to win?


I often say that how you spar with a child, is how you should spar with an adult.

Treat it seriously, but without fear.  Challenge them, help them improve, and learn.  If the focus is on the learning, you'll always improve.

Now, does that mean that every now and then you aren't going to grunt towards a specific outcome?  Of course not.

But winning, isn't winning.

What?  No, really:  Winning isn't winning.  I've grunted towards a specific outcome, and that outcome was a student landing in side control so that they would learn that specific transition.  I talked them through it, and helped them land there, and, as a result, they learned a new transition, and I got to defend myself from side control.

That's the point that is so hard for people to understand.  The winning is in the learning.  If you believe that you, or your partner will learn something from getting tapped out, then do so.  If you want to be on the ground, someone needs to be taken down to get there.  You don't learn as much waiting for an opportunity as you do from trying one out (regardless of outcome)

Pride, and competitiveness is what holds so many of us back.

Let's take an example where you are a large person partnered up with a small person, both with moderate skill.  Let's say that the large person has the advantage due to reach.

Could they remove that advantage by imagining that their faster, smaller partner had a knife, and that one hit, blocked or not, could be fatal?

Or, in that same example, could the large person learn from the smaller person's techniques, both in how to do them, and, how to counter them?

Or, again, in that same example, could the large person observe the body language of states (ie attack/defense) or study offensive offbalancing, range, timing, fakes etc etc etc.

If the large person was simply trying to win, they might have done so.  But how much did they improve?
We must always remember, that, in a collaborative school, we aren't training to beat each other - we're training to improve each other, so that if we were ever to use our skills in the real world, there would be an increased likelihood of success on our part.


Train as though tomorrow may bring danger to you, or your sparring partner, and you want them, and yourself, to be as ready as possible.


Communicate with your partner.  Saying something simple like "how can I take you down?" or "How do I get out of this?" will open up so many windows, as well as bring down any aggressive energy that may unintentionally erupt.

On the flipside, seeking to help your partner grow "try to take me down like this, see?" will open up windows as well.

Treat each sparring session as a lesson with two teachers, and two students.  Seek to grow, learn and train, not to win or lose.


Observe and acknowledge the use of new and innovative strategies and techniques, and inquire as to how they were done.

Learn, grow, train.


Sensei's Challenge: Find someone you are afraid to spar, spar them, and communicate with them as described above.

Learn from the experience and see if you can teach them as well!

Sensei Ono, Shinka Martial Arts
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